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A very Christmas viewing guide

There's something for everybody this season, from traditional fare to a very weird Christmas.

2012-12-19_2350I’ve scoured the Guides to dig up a slew of highlights for the festive season.

There’s something for everybody here, whether young or old.

There’s premieres, traditional Christmas fare, nostalgic movies, 70s sitcoms, concerts, documentaries , animation, sport and more…

ABC1
Monday December 24
6:00pm Carols From St Peter’s Cathedral
In the Christmas musical tradition long established by the Kings College Choir of Cambridge, join one of Australia’s finest cathedral choirs and celebrate Christmas.

7:30pm Nativity!
Mr Maddens, a primary school teacher, is charged with producing the school’s nativity play and competing against the posh rival school for the honour of ‘best show in town’. Cast: Martin Freeman

10:05pm Last Night Of The Proms 2012: Part 1
The last night of the UK’s annual Proms held at the Royal Albert Hall, London.

Tuesday December 25
5:00pm Doctor Who At The Proms 2010 Rpt

6:00pm Mother And Son: Christmas Drinks
It’s Christmas and Maggie wants Arthur to take her to church to sing carols, even though he has arranged a Christmas party for his friends. Rpt

7:20pm The Queen’s Christmas Message 2012
HM Queen Elizabeth gives her annual Christmas message to the Commonwealth.

8:30pm A Moody Christmas
How does an unsentimental family get through the most sentimental time of year? Such is the ordeal for Dan Moody when he journeys home from London to Australia each year to spend Christmas with his family. Rpt.

Wednesday December 26
12:40am The Eternity Man
A film opera about Arthur Stace, a reformed petty criminal, World War 1 veteran and recovering alcoholic, who spent nearly 40 years chalking a timeless message on the city’s streets: the single word – Eternity. Rpt.

4:00am Movie: The Hunchback Of Notre Dame (1939) Rpt

7:30pm Doctor Who: Christmas Special
Following the epic mid-season finale, the Doctor gets in the holiday spirit in the all-new Christmas special.

ABC2
Sunday December 23
9:35pm Louie. Louie has two memorable experiences.

Monday December 24
9:35pm Louie. Louie takes his daughters to visit his great aunt in the country. CAST: Louis C.K.

Tuesday December 25
5:30pm Peter Rabbit Christmas Special. Rpt.

7:00pm Spicks And Specks: A Very Specky Christmas
Join host Adam Hills and team captains Myf Warhurst and Alan Brough in a one-hour special of yuletide tunes and trivia. Rpt.

8:30pm Louis Theroux’s Weird Christmas
Louis spends a strange Christmas with some of the more outrageous stars of his Weird Weekends series (born again Christians, aliens, porn and hardcore survivalists). Cast: Louis Theroux.

9:35pm Louie. Louie rides the subway, and hangs out with his friend Pamela. CAST: Louis C.K.

Wednesday December 26
9:35pm Louie. Louie recalls his past career failures, and tries to get concert tickets for his daughter.

9:50pm Alan Carr: Chatty Man: Christmas Special
Loved by both the public and his guests for his irrepressible, warm and witty approach, Alan Carr hosts this side-splitting chat show.

ABC3
Monday December 24
7:00pm My Friend Bernard
Follows the adventures of Sam, a shy young boy who is given a magic pendant that transports him to an ice world. There he meets Bernard, a polar bear, who will help him overcome his fears.

Tuesday December 25
2:35pm Robbie The Reindeer: Close Encounters Of The Herd Kind. Rpt

6:10pm Almost Naked Animals: The Perfect Gift
Howie and the gang can’t open their presents until Narwhal gets there… Where is he?! Rpt

6:20pm Almost Naked Animals: Home For The Howiedays
Poodle and Batty reluctantly spend the Howiedays at the Banana Cabana. Rpt

8:35pm My Almost Famous Family: Christmas Time
The Totally Annabelle Christmas special is coming live from the Swann’s living room. Unfortunately Toyah’s OCD starts playing up, while mum is determined to find her presents, and Hadley is desperate to sing his solo. Rpt

Wednesday December 26
7:30pm Total Drama World Tour: Picnic at Hanging Rock
The challenge is an emu race up the Blue Mountains to Hanging Rock, followed by a bungie-jumping and a sheep shearing competition. Along the way, Courtney and Gwen each try to form a three-strong alliance to vote out the other. Rpt

ABC News 24
Tuesday December 25
8:20pm The Queen’s Christmas Message 2012

SEVEN
Saturday December 22
8:30pm Woolworths’ Carols In The Domain 2012
Matt White and Natalie Barr host this year’s Woolworths’ Carols in the Domain with a top line-up of Australian stars, including X Factor winner Samantha Jade, The Collective, Mark Vincent and Georgie Parker.

Wednesday December 26
12:30pm 2012 Sydney Hobart
The Rolex Sydney to Hobart race epitomises everything about offshore racing. It requires endurance, tactical skill and most of all, a determination to get to the finish.

7TWO
Sunday December 23
8:30PM Christmas Special: Keeping Up Appearances
Hyacinth organises a pageant in the church but a lack of volunteers means that Violet, Bruce, Onslow, Daisy and Rose have to help. Rpt.

Monday December 24
4:00PM Special: Dancesport – 2012 World Championships
One hour of non- stop music, colour and dance. It’s where the World’s best come together and dance their way into the history books for the title of the World Dancesport Champions 2012.

5:30PM Special: The Queen’s Diamond Jubilee Tattoo
Join Her Majesty the Queen in the magnificent private grounds of Windsor Castle for a ceremonial extravaganza, featuring an all-star line-up from around the world, including Susan Boyle and Il Divo. Narrated by Dame Helen Mirren and Martin Clunes. Rpt.

2012-12-19_2352Tuesday December 25
9:00AM 7TWO Movie: The Three Stooges In Orbit (1962)
The Stooges must battle alien spies to safeguard a goofy scientist’s revolutionary new vehicle. Rpt

8:45PM Christmas Special: Keeping Up Appearances 1991
After being coaxed into wearing a Santa costume, Richard plies the Christmas spirit, leaving him in no condition to play Santa. Rpt

9:30PM Christmas Special: Carry On Christmas
The Carry On team are at it again – celebrating Christmas. This year, Sid James is working as Father Christmas in the fairy grotto of a department store. Also starring Joan Sims, Barbara Windsor, Kenneth Connor, Bernard Bresslaw and Jack Douglas. Rpt.

NINE
Monday December 24
7:30pm The Making Of The Hobbit
Come behind the scenes of the first of three Hobbit movies from Lord Of The Rings director Peter Jackson. Shot in New Zealand, this movie is sure to follow in the success of Lord Of The Rings, The Hobbit: An Unexpected Journey hits cinema’s Boxing Day.

8:00pm Carols By Candlelight
Join us in song this Christmas Eve as Channel Nine broadcasts the 75th Vision Australia Carols by Candlelight from the Sidney Myer Music Bowl. Presented by Karl Stefanovic and Lisa Wilkinson along with an array of top
entertainers who will perform a mix of the season’s favourite contemporary and traditional carols.

Tuesday December 25

7:30pm National Lampoon’s Christmas Vacation
The Griswold family’s plans for a big family Christmas predictably turn into a big disaster. Starring: Chevy Chase, Beverly D’Angelo, Randy Quaid, John Randolph, Julia Louis- Dreyfuss. Rpt

11:55pm 2012 Queen’s Christmas Message

Wednesday December 26
10:00am Day 1 – AM Session
Wide World Of Sports presents the Boxing Day Test live from the MCG between Australia and Sri Lanka. Join
Richie Benaud, Bill Lawry, Ian Chappell, Mark Nicholas, Mark Taylor, Ian Healy and Michael Slater for all the action.

GO!
Tuesday December 25
9:30am Bah Humduck! Looney Christmas
In a hilarious take on the holiday classic, “A Christmas Carol”, “A Looney Tunes Christmas” follows the exploits of Daffy Duck, the proprietor of the Lucky Duck mega-mart. To take financial advantage of last minute shoppers, Daffy demands all his employees to work on Christmas Day. Rpt.

2012-12-19_235312:30pm Bugs Bunny’s Looney Christmas Tales
Bugs Bunny and the gang present their version of the Dickens’ classic, A Christmas Carol. Rpt.

7:30pm Deck The Halls
Mathew Broderick plays a Christmas mad suburban dad who decorates his house each year to be the best in the
neighbourhood. His world is turned upside down when his new neighbour plans the biggest light display, one so big that he hopes it can be seen from outer space! Starring: Danny De Vito, Matthew Broderick, Kristine David. Rpt.

GEM
Sunday December 23
4:00pm Movie: Mame (1974)
Mame Dennis is a zesty, eyebrow-raising eccentric who suddenly finds herself guardian to her orphaned nephew. But while her parenting credentials may be dubious, she has plenty to teach the lad about living life to the hilt.

7:30pm To the Manor Born
Christmas Special – The First Noel
Following in family tradition Audrey and Marjory create a crib for the church though it is very crudely put together. Richard, on the other hand, asked by the vicar as lord of the manor, to contribute one, has a far more commercial model. Rpt.

TEN
Sunday December 23
8:30pm Homeland
The Choice
S2 E12: In tonight’s final episode, Carrie must decide where her heart really lies: Is it still with the CIA?

Monday December 24
12:30am Saint Mary Mackillop, Soul Of The Sunburnt Country
The Canonisation of Mother Mary MacKillop as Australia’s first Saint has brought a renewed focus on the life and legacy of this pioneering woman.

Wednesday December 26
7:30 pm Wedding Band
Time Of My Life
Guest Starring: Molly Sims, Briana Lane, Joe Lo Truglio, Fiona Gubelmann

ELEVEN
Tuesday December 25
11:00 am The Love Boat
The Christmas Presence
All aboard, the Love Boat is ready to set sail! What madcap misadventures and romantic rendezvous await the crew and passengers of the Pacific Princess? Starring: Gavin Macleod, Bernie Kopell, Fred Grandy, Ted Lange, Lauren Tewes, Jill Whelan, Ted McGinley. Rpt.

2012-12-19_23555:30 pm The Brady Bunch
The Voice Of Christmas
Here’s the story of a lovely lady I you know how it goes! Carol married Mike, both have three children each, together with housekeeper, Alice, and dog, Tiger, they became the Brady Bunch.

6:30 pm Frasier (Rpt) The Fight Before Christmas
Guest Starring: Jane Adams, Saul Rubinek
Frasier plans an extravagant Christmas party; meanwhile Daphne feels awkward around Niles after learning of his feelings for her. Rpt.

SBS ONE
Sunday December 23rd, 2012
8:35 pm Stephen Hawking’s Grand Design: The Meaning of Life –
In this episode, Professor Stephen Hawking tackles the most personal, yet cosmic of questions: Is there a meaning to our lives? Hawking explores what the laws of physics reveals about who and what we humans really are? Do we have free will or are we just complex biological machines working to the laws of nature? From Descartes to the latest advances in quantum physics, Hawking explores this fascinating territory with his famous fearless zeal as he questions the very nature of reality itself.

2012-12-19_2357Monday December 24
9:30 pm Heston’s Feasts: Christmas
Cooking maestro Heston Blumenthal creates his ultimate feast for Christmas using majestic dishes from history to create his menu. Heston is bored with the usual Christmas fare, so he’s going to completely reinvent it to include edible dormouse, venison and tasty snow. His celebrity guests include actor Charlie Higson, broadcaster Mariella Frostrup, comedian Arabella Weir, former rugby player Matt Dawson, actor James Purefoy, and journalist Kate Spicer. Rpt

Tuesday December 25th
1:00 pm PopAsia Christmas Special
Features back-to-back videos from artists across Asia and all the latest news and interviews from the Korean, Japanese, Mandarin and Cantonese pop scenes.

9:15 pm Film: Micmacs (2009)
This whimsical fantasy comedy, from acclaimed director Jean-Pierre Jeunet, takes on the arms dealers of the world. While standing in the doorway of the video shop where he works, Bazil has been inadvertently shot in the head. Now homeless and jobless, he is taken in by a troupe of misfits who live in a giant mound of trash. There Bazil begins his quest for revenge against the people who produced the gun that shot him. Nominated for three César Awards in 2010. Stars Dany Boon, Dominique Pinon and Julie Ferrier. (From France, in French)

Wednesday December 26th, 2012
9:30 pm Film: In the Loop (2009)
Simon Foster is a hapless junior minister whose access to the halls of power in Downing Street is marginal, and whose opinion has never really mattered. Until now. Following a series of ill-advised comments regarding the likelihood of an English/American alliance going to war in the Middle East, Foster inadvertently sets off a chain of events that may just skew an impending UN vote on the issue. Nominated for an Oscar in 2010 for Best Writing, Adapted Screenplay. Directed by Armando Iannucci and stars Tom Hollander, Peter Capaldi and James Gandolfini. (From the UK)

SBS TWO
Sunday December 23rd, 2012
8:40pm Paul Simon: Live at Webster Hall – In June 2011, Paul Simon ended his So Beautiful or So What tour of small clubs and theatres in the United States by playing Webster Hall, a historic 1,400-person club in New York. The set list was drawn from his legendary career and includes several songs that have not been performed live in many years. Kodachrome, Mother and Child Reunion, Gone at Last and The Obvious Child are just some of the highlights, along with songs from Simon’s latest album So Beautiful or So What.

10:45pm Film: Nosferatu (1922)
Based on Bram Stokers’ Dracula, this remains one of the most impressive silent features of all time. Thomas Hutter is sent from the German town of Wisborg to Transylvania to negotiate the sale of a house to a Count Orlok. Initially dismissive of his beautiful wife’s premonitions and the warnings of the local villagers and gypsies, Hutter realises only too late that Orlok is a vampire. Directed by F.W. Murnau and stars Max Schreck, Greta Schroeder and Gustav von Wangenheim. (From Germany) (Rpt)

FOXTEL

Sunday December 23
CHANNEL [V]
HOMEBAKE 2012 SPECIAL
5.00pm Welcome to Homebake Music, Film, Comedy & Arts Festival 2012 – The Global Edition! Celebrating its 17th year this December, Homebake once again brings festival lovers the best of Australia’s talent. And for the first time, international artist Blondie will also hit the stage this year performing their biggest hits. Channel [V] will be hitting The Domain in Sydney to bring you all the action from this year’s stellar event and show you why Homebake is one of this country’s most loved summer festivals. Join the Channel [V] crew as they bring you your insider’s guide to the extravaganza that is Homebake. Featuring interviews with the crème de la crème of artists including Hilltop Hoods, Kimbra, Angus Stone, Julia Stone, San Cisco and more, you’ll also get a tour of the festival, plus we’ll be turning the camera on festivalgoers to find out what they love about Homebake and this year’s lineup. If that’s not enough, Channel [V] will also show you the view from what will no doubt be the best seat in the house: 50 metres up in the air! The Ele[V]ator will be descending on Homebake – a bar suspended by a crane 50 metres above the crowd. Which artists will be game enough to take a trip in The Ele[V]ator with Channel [V]?

2012-12-19_2358Monday December 24
UKTV
7.30pm Wallace and Gromit
A Grand Day Out
8.05pm Wallace and Gromit
The Wrong Trousers
8.35pm Wallace and Gromit
A Close Shave
9.10pm Wallace and Gromit
A Matter of Loaf and Death

Tuesday December 25
MAX
6.00am Christmas Day on MAX
8 Hour Programming Event. This Christmas Day, include MAX in your celebrations for a seasonally-appropriate musical ride. The first thing needed to get you in the Christmas mood, is great Christmas music. So from 6am, MAX hosts Jane Gazzo & Chit Chat countdown the Top 40 Christmas Songs of all time. From John Lennon’s Happy Christmas to Mariah Carey’s All I Want For Christmas and Wham’s Last Christmas, there’s something in it for everyone.

FOX Classics
8.35pm Meet Me in St Louis (1944)
Musical. Judy Garland, Margaret O’Brien. (G)
10.30pm South Pacific (1958)
Musical. Rossano Brazzi, Mitzi Gaynor. (G)

Please check local Guides.

15 Responses

  1. Yes I agree that TEN did the right thing with “Homeland” going through until the end and big thanks to TEN for putting on “Hawaii 5 0 ” at 8.30 instead of a very boring Nine offering with “The Voice” Carols !

  2. Every Sunday morning for the last 40+ years Channel Ten has had Mass For You At Home. But on Christmas Day, the most celebrated day of the Christian calendar, Ten does nothing.

    And I thought with all its British programming that 7Two might have had 5 minutes to dedicate to Her Majesty’s Christmas message 🙂

  3. As I mentioned in an earlier thread, it looked like very slim pickings on the ABC, and moreso on the other networks. “Repeat” seems to be the most oft repeated word.

    Having said that, is the Jonathon Ross Christmas Show a repeat or first run? And from 2012 or from last Christmas?

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