Best Gogglebox lines: Oct 21

The Goggleboxers were universal in their condemnation of Mesmerised this week, but involved with House Husbands and divided over Pokie Nation.

Pleased to see they viewed last week’s Gruen but they missed an opportunity with the show’s segment on domestic violence -the best advertising they had dissected this year.

And no Keith and Lee this week!

A Current Affair:
It sounds like Funniest Home Video Show.
I like how the reporter talks as one of us.
What about that cow that used the helicopter?
This is such a non-story it’s laughable.
Cross-promotion for The Block, which is probably coming up next.
Remember when ACA used to be hard cutting, with Ray Martin and Mike Willesee?
I think it started to turn the corner with Mike Munro.
Dog: **hack**

Beach Cops:
It’s like Bondi Rescue but with cops.
I can’t believe anyone would make a television programme about something as stupid.
I love this show. It’s a ripper.

Mesmerised:
Surely it’s fake.
I am 100% sold on hypnotism.
It’s just not funny.
Stupid.
Funny.
Bullshit.
Hilarious.
Channel Seven is the one that likes the funniest cat videos, don’t they?
This is the worst acting I’ve ever seen.
They won’t let us get married but they let a man get married to an alpaca.
I reckon it will last one episode.
I really want to believe in hypnotism and that show makes it shit.

House Husbands:
I like Julia Morris. But I don’t like her acting.
Is she cross-eyed a bit? I’ve never noticed until now.
I’m sorry judges are f***ed in the head. Even real judges.
This will be legal in the next year. It should be legal now.
Snog. Pash it on.
What an emotional rollercoaster this episode’s been.

River Cottage Australia:
F***!
They just showed us that!
I can’t look at that.
Bloody hell, meat lover’s pizza will be glorious after this.
It’s like Farmer makes a wife.

Ka-Ching! Pokie Nation:
That’s my boss!
It’s like any addiction.
They don’t hold your arm behind your back.
How sad, when you think about children who don’t have enough to eat.

Back In Time For Dinner (in the 1980s):
I wanted to be Alexis Carrington.
Yum, jaffles!
Everybody had wine casks. Now you’d have to be a derelict to drink wine out of a box.
Pizza and a goon. Sounds like my last Sat’day.

Ramsay’s Kitchen Nightmares USA:
He tells you when you’re shit.
Three people ejaculated over the meat.
Salmonella city.
That looks like spew.
Gordon Ramsay is a d***. We love him, but he’s a d***.

Gruen:
She looks like a salad eater. I bet she’s never eaten a lolly or a chocolate in her life.
You look like a hamburger, malakka!